An attempt at 'A Chinese Song of Bread and Honey '....

Yipee...this is my first image upload to my blog...I park my car underneath this tree.
Here goes with my attempt at writing a poem with Michi's Poetry Title Generator's suggestion 'A Chinese Song of Bread and Honey'...(it reads somewhat dodgily so will be chopping and changing it no doubt!)
A Chinese Song of Bread and Honey
It is Autumn. She is at the kitchen dresser. The tone of purple
bamboo blows through a side slit and her fingers move on 6 holes.
A sound, so mellifluous, that even ancient vases, bird cages and
lanterns with bright, red hearts might tumble sideways. She
drinks a mother’s farewell wine made from honey and normally
drunk at a Peking Opera. Two flashbacks later and she is spraying
acrobatic fire and the silver face of a long-lost lover gallops
to her. Memories of him squat on bone flute sounds snatched from
far away.And further away by a pounding waterfall,a frog with
recessed ears has a shortened path between eardrums and memory.
He hears chimes, bells, a Song Dynasty and a story of how these
lovers once blotted dry a Chinese honey goose, while shiny,
poppy-red bread hissed on a steamer. He gluts on sweet-peas.
A lover-turned-ultrasonic-frog has no business in a Chinese
song of bread and honey. She ignores the ex-lover-now-frog
interference, jams shut the latch on memory overload, corks
the mother’s farewell wine, proceeds to shine the set of bone
china, tooth-picking dust from underneath delicate handles
and placing cup inside cup, on their side, behind glass.
****************************************************************************
The layout may look out of sync in the published blog...I've given up on trying to fix it!
4 Comments:
I'm glad to see your blog seems to be working now. Sorry I hadn't checked back sooner.
That tree is rather intersting looking, isn't it?
I like your poem. I might have to send mine back to the PTG. I can't seem to get anywhere with it!
Hi Lauren,
Thanks for looking in.
Yeah I think the hollowed part in the trunk of the tree looks like a swollen heart :0)
Hope something works out for your PTG title...:0)
Liz-Anne
oh i think you're on to something here, liz. it might need a bit of revision, but the soul / core of it is there. i particularly like:
The tone of purple / bamboo blows through a side slit
A sound ... that even ancient vases, bird cages and /lanterns with bright, red hearts might tumble sideways
Two flashbacks later and she is spraying / acrobatic fire
a frog with / recessed ears has a shortened path between eardrums and memory.
tooth-picking dust from underneath delicate handles / and placing cup inside cup
great job - it was not an easy title, was it?
m
Michi, thanks for your feedback on this...it was tricky and had me cornered a few times...hope I can settle down to sort it out properly at some stage!
Liz
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